Friday, 16 March 2018

Animal Folk (1d20)

Upon discovering a new village or town, the population are not human, but animal folk. Use as many puns and references to the nature/diet/stereotypes/myths of the original animal as you can. They wear little hats or waistcoats or something.


1: Roll again but it’s just that animal, not a person-version. The town is overrun.
2:
Frog. Upstanding and noble, like knights in a fairy tale. Their princess is a human.
3: Racoon. Genial and lazy, like good-for-nothing uncles. Join the feast! What, leaving already?
4: Fox. Sly and inquisitive, like greasy salespeople. Eager to sell their enchanting wares.
5: Catfish. Friendly and dull, but well-meaning. A giant one out by the waterfall offers advice.
6: Crow. Pious and brash, like haughty nuns. The first night you stay, someone robs the shrine.
7: Cow/Bull. Hard-working and passionate, outspoken frontiersfolk. Won’t suffer ne’er-do-wells.
8:
Pig. Friendly and wise, like fat old critics. Can tell you anything about any food they sniff.
9:
Owl. Stuffy and bookish, like terse librarians. You can stay as long as you don’t make noise.
10: Caterpillar. All but one are cocooned, the last is tidying up before he joins them.
11:
Macaque. Good-humoured and lascivious, like staff in a bordello. Know some great stories.
12:
Mouse. Actual size. Borrowers-style, under the floorboards of a seemingly abandoned house.
13:
Bear. Polite and genteel, keep a few treasures. If you come in winter, they’re all asleep.
14:
Bat. The night sky is to them as the beach is to surfer dudes. Something’s been hunting them.
15:
Goat. Rural and standoffish, like ornery farmers. Best be on your way, now.
16:
Lizard. Sunbathing and off their faces on pipeweed. Got any food?
17:
Deer. Very well-to-do. They sell little snowglobes and kitschy wooden ornaments.
18:
Warthog. Brusque but kind. They’ll offer their ugliest child in marriage, plus a huge dowry.
19:
Crab. Terminally unimpressed.
20:
Roll again but they share the place with humans, roll 1d4. 1-2: They live in harmony, 3: They have an uneasy alliance, 4: One knows nothing of the other.

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