Monday, 17 April 2023

Mudhar’s Whimsies

 Mudhar’s Whimsies was once a small but stable independent manufacturer of novelty items, operating from a union-controlled satellite in the mid-rim. Their prank items were quickly added to a nearby marine chapter’s long list of contraband, which ensured their proliferation throughout the lower ranks.

This Streisand Effect (so named after a Mother Earth philosopher) was exacerbated when the company’s products were banned as flight risks by the Qilin Gate Company, following an incident involving an android pilot, a whoopee cushion and a shipment of imitation peanut butter.

Mrs Mudhar now enjoys a proliferation of trade across the outer rim. Some of the manufacturer’s most popular offerings include:

1. Exploding cigarettes. Sold in packaging closely resembling the popular brands Gorilla and Lucky Star, despite the copyright holders’ protestations. A single cigarette is a loud firecracker, while a 10-pack lit at once is similar in effect to a flashbang grenade.

2. The Super Pellet Popper (formerly Super Pellet Gun, renamed to comply with union trade regulation). Fires proprietary pellets in 5 harmless but nonetheless effective varieties: Sticky!, Spicy!, Slippery!, Smoky! and Sparky!. The latter is often hard to come by, as anarchist sects favour it for its utility in shutting down simple electronics.

3. Mudhar’s Fantastical Enjoyment Buzzer. An evolution of an ancient design, concealed in the palm and emitting a vibration similar in sensation to a mild electric shock when pressed against a surface, eg during a handshake. Popular for its presumably unintended utility as both a sex toy and a means of identifying disguised androids, who are unable to react to the buzz in an appropriately human manner.

4. Holochete. A fake boarding knife that can be used to feign injury.

5. Mudhar’s Abominable Itching Powder. Notoriously irritating and difficult to clean. The chemical reaction with human or synthetic skin won’t occur in cold temperatures, leading to the classic boot camp prank of lining a cryochamber or vaccsuit with the powder so that it transfers to the victim while in use, and waiting for the effect to start once they return to a temp-reg zone.


(also BREAK!! is live on KS baybeeeeeeeeee)

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