Tuesday 13 December 2022

Bare Bones updated!

 The newest version of the Bare Bones of Graverobbers just went live. Download for free here.


Updates include new item lists, clarifications and general changes for tone etc.


More on the way from Graverobbers soon. Happy gaming xox

Wednesday 30 November 2022

TERROR… FROM BEYOND THE STARS!

 A Mothership hack.


TERROR… FROM BEYOND THE STARS!

 

House Rules

-        Replace Combat stat with Social. Roll Strength and Speed for melee and ranged attacks.

-        Roll for Cast and Role instead of Class and Patch/Trinket. No Skills or Saves, 20 HP, 1 Wound.

-        On a failed roll, gain Schlock instead of Stress. All characters share the same Schlock total.

-        Players may roll the Panic die under Schlock for a stroke of luck. +1 Schlock each Panic roll.

-        At 20 Schlock, the adventure becomes unbearable. Game Over!

 

Cast

-        Ascended Stuntperson: +10 Strength. [+] on STR, [-] on Social.

-        Precocious Starlet. +10 Speed. Reroll Panic die once per session.

-        Incongruous Thespian: +10 Intellect. Once per session, reduce Schlock by 1d5.

-        Sex Symbol: +10 Social. +1d5 Schlock at 0AP.

-        Puppet Sidekick: +10 all stats. No Role, +1 Schlock on successful checks.

 

Role

-        Chosen One: Light Sword (1d10), Impractical Armour (5AP), [+] all checks vs a single enemy

-        Dashing Rogue: Raygun (1d10[+]), Stylish Clothing (1AP), [-] all attacks against you

-        Galactic Royalty: Raygun (1d10[+]), Elaborate Costume (3AP), understand any language

-        Otherworlder: Strange Weapon (2d5), Rubbery Suit (3 AP), return from death once.

-        Star Wizard: Fancy Robes (1AP), 5 SFX budget per session, spend at will, +1 Schlock per use

o   3 SFX: Pyrotechnics, 5d10 area dmg

o   2 SFX: Mind Magic, incapacitate 1 enemy

o   0 SFX: Transmit Thought to any ally

 

Forbidden Temple of the Moon Lizards

1.     Exterior.

a.     Dense jungle plants surround huge stone door, hallway within.

b.     2 lizard men guards [C:50 (Spear 1d10), I:60]. Pick and eat jungle fruits.

c.      Carvings on wall in strange language lead to side passage and dungeon.

2.     Hallway.

a.     Flaming torches, uniform stone walls. Portrait of lizard queen, oddly human.

b.     Grand doors to the arena. Heavy beam used to barricade them from this side.

c.      Cold, dark steps down to the prison.

3.     Arena.

a.     Circular balcony over huge pit, doors to hallway.

b.     Lizard queen on far side, enthroned. Vain, vindictive and greedy.

c.      Sturdy gates in the pit below connect to the prison and dungeon.

4.     Prison.

a.     Dank, cold stone beneath the planet’s surface. Cells guarded by lizard men.

b.     Stairs up to the warm, well-lit hallway. A passage to the arena pit.

c.      A prisoner spouts exposition before dying dramatically.

5.     Dungeon.

a.     Underground chamber. A monster [C:70 (Claws 2d10), I:50]. Chained, kept hungry. 

b.     Passage to arena pit, secret passage to exterior.

c.      Rack of lizard spears (1d10 dmg), long rope, barrel of sticky tar.

Wednesday 23 November 2022

FULL TILT playtest

Art by Chloe Rouillon

//

This morning I whipped up a miniatures game, completely untested but I thought I’d pop it on here to get it out of my brain and see if anyone was interested.

Another implementation of the mechanic from Onslaught and JRJ, this time as a spaceship joust!

Playable with any 2 toy spaceships. Give it a go and let me know if this is something you’d like to see more of 👍

Link to word doc is here: https://1drv.ms/w/s!AgChr-AiN8jJkRUP5d_XeYJDpj1J

Sunday 13 November 2022

Hard Times at the Horseshoe

 

being an Account of the Cruelties of the most Terrible Gaol in Blackside

Get it here.

An optional rule for Unlucky characters in Graverobbers - instead of being immediately retired, get put in prison. Now it’s up to the other characters to break you out! Also includes a lovely recipe for fish sauce.

Last Graverobbers pamphlet adventure for the foreseeable while I get ready for next year’s offerings x

Monday 24 October 2022

Your First Black Market Phase

If you’re playing GRAVEROBBERS for the first time this spooky season, this post will hopefully ease you into part of it!

Of course, like riding a bike, the best way to learn is to just get your bum in the saddle. Definitely not to read about it on the internet. But, since you’re here already…


GRAVEROBBERS has a couple of “phases” of play it switches between. The Black Market phase involves the players prepping for a stealth mission, and the Red Moon phase is them doing the job.

The way the latter works will be familiar to anyone who’s run a rules-light OSR-style game before, while the former is very slightly different. (If you have no experience at all that’s ok too, these games don’t require any skills you haven’t already practised on the playground as a kid.)

This is an imagined play report of how a Black Market phase might go. I’ve aimed to include some of the basic things a group playing for the first time might go through, and how a moderately competent Dealer might handle things.

This Dealer is using The Bell of Blackside, an introductory pamphlet adventure, and the Bare Bones of GRAVEROBBERS, which is the basic rules. They aren’t using any additional notes or prep. You can get both pamphlets here and read along if that helps.

One final thing to note is that, of course, your players will not do any of this. They never do what you expect. So don’t expect!


BLACK MARKET PHASE - PLAY EXAMPLE

Dealer: Ok we’ve all got characters so let’s just start I guess!

Player A: I can’t believe I died five times during character creation haha

Dealer: So this is a game about, like stealth. Stealth missions. Heists and shit. So, um, what we, what you have to do first obviously is prepare for the job. This is just a one shot so I’m just going to give you a job, but obviously like, if we played more games your characters would investigate and plan their own jobs or whatever.

Player B: So we’re playing these characters?

Dealer: Yeah. So the job is that there’s basically this legendary bell. You all live in this place that’s like, fantasy London, Dickensian kind of, or like Elizabethan era. I’ll be honest, it’s not clear. But anyway there’s this legendary bell in a tower that hasn’t been rung for years. The House have it locked up. But there’s a rebellion, that’s you guys, and you’re planning to ring the bell. As a symbol to the town that change is coming.

Player A: Oh, the House is like the bad guys, from what it says here.

Dealer: Yeah exactly. They’re the people you’re trying not to get caught by while you do these stealth missions. They run the city, they’re the government and the police and everything. And you’re criminals.

Player B: Ok cool. So it’s illegal to ring this bell?

Dealer: Yeah it’s like… a symbol of the good old days or something, I guess. Basically, your job is to break into the bell tower and ring this bell.

(Pause)

Dealer: Like, that’s it.

Player A: Ok well my guy has a rope so-

Dealer: Oh wait, so basically first up is the Black Market phase, basically the prep phase. So you’re going to prepare for the job before you do it. But each thing you do, you have to draw a card from the deck.

Player B: This deck we took all the face cards out of.

Dealer: Yeah. So the only cards are 1 to 10, Aces count as 1. And it’s… I mean, it’s literally just blackjack. Every thing you do to prepare for the heist, you draw one card. And if you get higher than 13 total, you have to stop and you lose 1 Luck. So it’s a risk of when you choose to stop.

Player A: Oh, sick.

Player B: Luck is like HP right?

Dealer: Yeah. Kind of. No. But yes.

Player A: Yeah that’s cool, so like you can only do a certain amount of things before you get caught. Like they’re onto you.

Dealer: Yeah, so literally like… you guys tell me what you want to do, and draw a card, and then I say what happens.

(Pause)

Dealer: So what do you want to do?

Player A: What can we do?

Dealer: I mean, anything. But obviously you want to stuff that’s relevant to the job. So like… I mean, think of heist movies and stuff. What do criminals do before the job? So like, planning, scoping out the location, getting tools and supplies, hiring people, finding out information -

Player A: Oh cool. But like, we don’t know anything really. You just told us we have to ring this bell.

Dealer: Yeah so like, you have to find out more first… Ok, let’s do it like this. You guys meet in a pub, it’s this shady tavern in Blackside, which is a district in the city. And you’ve agreed you’re going to do this job, you know the tower is nearby and the bell is there, you just need to plan your first move.

Player A: Oh so we know where it is.

Dealer: Yeah like you live here so basic stuff your characters would know, about daily life or what’s around or whatever, you can just ask me and I’ll tell you. No need to draw a card or anything.

Player A: Ok so first thing I want to do is go and have a look at the tower. Like, look for a way in.

Dealer: Like a stakeout?

Player A: Oh yeah, exactly! Yeah that’s so cool. Yeah I want to camp out outside, in like a tree or something and do a stakeout.

Dealer: Ok cool. So that’s a meaningful action that’s going to give you something helpful for the mission, so you need to draw a card.

Player A: Ok… 8.

Dealer: Oof. That’s kind of high.

Player A: Yeah we can’t go over 13 right? Shit. Ok well I’ll do the stakeout first and then I’ll think about if I want to draw again.

Dealer: Yeah like, you can go over 13 but you don’t want to. You still get the thing you draw for, at least it seem like the rules don’t say you don’t. But you’ll lose 1 Luck, and you only have 3.

Player B: How do we get Luck back?

Dealer: Drawing cards.

Player A: Haha, brutal.

Dealer: Ok so you’re going to camp out and watch the tower, you’re going to find out a lot of helpful stuff. I’ll tell you in just a sec, Player B do you know what you’re going to do?

Player B: Uh I have some ideas but I don’t know.

Dealer: Ok well I’ll say what happens on the stakeout and then we’ll go to you next. So Player A, you find a tree on the other side of the street from this tower. It’s like a big, thirteen yards tall tower. Thirteen metres ish I guess. This old, ancient looking grey stone, four walls going straight up. Like sheer walls, no windows. Then at the top there’s an opening in each wall. Y’know, like a bell tower. Not windows, but like -

Player A: The belfry.

Dealer: Yeah that’s what they call it here. Is that the word for it? Anyway. Yeah it’s like 13 metres up these straight stone walls, and there are gargoyles around it but nothing else on the main bit of the tower.

Player A: Is there a way in?

Dealer: Well there’s a door. Just a wooden door in the south wall. And what you see as you’re like waiting up in this tree, is that there’s a guard outside the door. He’s this big guy, like old times police looking guy, with a big hat and this big stick for like… beating people with. The sticks, by the way, that’s like an official weapon all the House guards have. “Official truncheon”.

Player A: And there’s no windows, no other way in?

Dealer: Nope. But you notice a couple of other things, waiting up in this tree.

Player A: Nobody sees me?

Dealer: No, because you still have Luck. You get caught when you run out, but you still have some so you can’t get caught. Obviously if you walk straight up to the guard and tell him you’re a criminal that’s different, but you can’t like… fail at hiding or anything yet.

Player A: Ok. I think I get it.

Dealer: Yeah just roll with it, it’ll come into play more when you’re doing the job. So what you notice during the stakeout, you’re up in this tree, well hidden. And there are two main things that stand out to you. First, the guards change at sunrise and sunset.

Player A: Oh I was there all day haha

Dealer: Haha yeah so at sunrise a guard actually comes out of the tower door, and a new guy comes in. And then at sunset same thing, a different guy comes and changes shifts. They go into the tower and wait there all day or night. The other thing you notice is that there’s a lamppost, kind of near the tower. And every night, just after the guard changes, this guy comes and lights the lamppost. Like an old fashioned… oil lamp or whatever.

Player A: Ok. Interesting. Does one guard look weaker or anything?

Dealer: Oh it’s a different guy every time. Just like generic, big strong mook guys. Bouncers.

Player A: Ok. That’s going to be an issue.

Dealer: Ok, think about whether you want to do anything else or draw again. In the meantime, Player B, what are you doing?

Player B: Ok so, uh, I have some ideas. I’m not sure.

Dealer: Well just let me know what you’re thinking and we can talk it out. And I can give you some basic info.

Player B: Ok well you said like… stuff people do when you’re preparing for a job. Like a heist, kind of, we’re not stealing this bell right.

Player A: We’re just ringing it.

Dealer: But yeah, same basic idea. Like Ocean’s 11, planning all the moves and what everyone’s going to do.

Player B: Ok cool. So what I was thinking, it says my person has distracting clothing. So can I get like, a disguise?

Player A: Or you could literally distract the guard.

Dealer: Well it’s up to you but yeah, I like the disguise idea. There’s a clothes shop nearby where you can buy a disguise. It says here a new outfit is £2.

Player B: Oh shit. £1 is 12d right?

Player A: Yeah.

Player B: Yeah I have like… 7d.

Dealer: Ok well it says a whole outfit is £2, I’m going to say that like… if you just want to get one thing, like a it cloak that covers your clothes or whatever, that would cost just 6d. Just like a big bit of fabric basically.

Player B: Hmm. Ok. But I’m still very poor.

Dealer: Haha yeah you guys are like street rats basically. That’s part of why you’re rebelling against this ruling class.

Player B: Ok well my other idea was to get a torch or something, but you said there’s a street lamp by night so…

Dealer: Outside, yeah. But you don’t know what’s inside.

Player A: Oh and there’s no windows, right? It could be dark in there.

Dealer: Actually yeah, that’s a thing you would’ve seen on the stakeout. The guard who goes in by night takes in a lantern, like an oil lantern. And it looks kinda gloomy in there when he opens the door.

Player B: Ok, huh. So we might need a lamp then.

Player A: Or we can knock out the guard and take his lamp. If we go by night.

Player B: Oh yeah I was just assuming we’d go by night. Yeah, I guess we could.

Dealer: Up to you guys.

Player B: How much is a lamp?

Dealer: Hm. Oh, actually ok, let’s see… ah. Yeah so you go to this candle shop. Seven Sisters Guildhouse and Chandlery. And a lamp there is like… £1.

Player B: Shit. Everything’s so expensive!

Dealer: To you, yeah! But they do have candles there. You can get a small candle for 1d.

Player B: Ooh, ok. I might do that then.

Dealer: Buying something is a draw, a card draw. Plus you subtract the money.

Player B: Should I get a candle?

Player A: I mean we don’t really know. But it seems useful right?

Dealer: I mean… you can imagine there would probably be at least some part of the tower where you’d need a light. Obviously the guard has a lantern. But you would have your own light source. Plus it’s a candle, you can use the wax to make a mould of something, or do whatever.

Player B: You can do that?

Dealer: You can do anything!

Player B: Ok yeah, I want to buy a candle. 1d?

Dealer: Yeah so draw and mark off the money on your record.

Player A: Which one should they do first?

Dealer: I don’t think it matters.

Player B: I got a 2.

Player A: Oh nice.

Dealer: That’s good! In fact you literally can’t get to 13 with you next card. So if you want to draw again, you’re guaranteed safe. Because the most it’ll add up to is 12.

Player A: Oh sick.

Player B: Nice, ok so I should draw again?

Dealer: Yeah, to do another thing though. Buy something else, or anything else you want to do to plan. By the way this shop has lamps, oil, soap, rope, scissors and sealing wax.

Player B: Soap?

Player A: Oh get that and make the guard slip on it haha

Dealer: Actually, one other thing you notice while you’re in here… You see someone that you saw, Player A, while you were on your stakeout.

Player A: The guard?

Dealer: Actually no, it’s the person who came along to light the lamp post. So this is a guild house, so basically the Lamplighters’ Guild work from here. And they light all the lamp posts. So we’ll say that this all happens after the stakeout, so Player A’s character already told you about this lamp guy.

Player A: Oh shit. You can bribe him to not light the lamp.

Player B: Oh, really? Would that be useful?

Dealer: Up to you. But you see him here and you know who he is.

Player A: Ohhhh ok, here’s a plan. How about this. You bribe this guy to not light the lamppost. Then it’s completely dark outside. Then I have a rope and grappling hook, I can climb up the outside of the tower. And nobody will see because the lamp is out.

Dealer: Just checking, how long is your rope?

Player A: Six yards. Oh yeah, the tower is tall, right? Shit.

Dealer: Yeah, thirteen yards. You’d need double the length.

Player B: Oh but they sell rope here right?

Dealer: Yes they do.

Player B: So you can buy like six more yards of rope and tie them together.

Dealer: Yeah, I’d say that’d work.

Player A: Ok so let’s say I’m there at the shop too, how much is rope?

Dealer: 2d per yard.

Player A: Oh yeah it says here. Ok I can buy most of that, can you spot me the rest of the money?

Player B: Is that allowed?

Dealer: Yeah I don’t see why not.

Player B: Yeah I can give you up to 6d.

Player A: Perfect. Yeah ok, if we want to go with this plan and you’re ok lending me the money then let’s do that. Six yards of rope please Dealer!

Dealer: Ok, are you buying this? Because you have to draw.

Player A: Oh yeah. Shit. Do I want to do that?

Player B: It’s ok I can draw.

Player A: You sure?

Player B: Yeah no worries.

Dealer: Ok so you can draw and we know you won’t strike 13. So you’re buying 6 yards of rope yeah? That’s 12d between you, so £1.

Player B: Ok I’ve crossed off my last 6d. And I draw… a 5.

Dealer: So you’re now at 7 total. Could draw again? Or could play it safe.

Player B: Yeah I don’t know, I really don’t want to lose any luck before we even start the job.

Dealer: Up to you. Player A, did you cross off the 6d on your record?

Player A: Yeah I have 2d left. What can I get for 2d?

Dealer: Hmm. Some soap? Or a hot pork pasty? There’s a few things around, or you can think of something and I’ll just kind of work out how much it would probably cost. But remember you’d have to draw again.

Player A: Oh yeah shit. Ok, maybe not then.

Dealer: Ok so are you guys done then do you reckon? Finished with the Black Market Phase?

Player B: Well I mean if we don’t want to draw… But do we have enough to do the job?

Dealer: Well you have a plan. You have supplies. You have information on the guards and their schedule. And you have a candle if you need it.

Player A: Yeah we’re set! You’re right, let’s play it safe, I don’t want to risk anything.

Dealer: One more thing, you are in this pub remember, so if you want to ask around for information or rumours this would be a good time. Just get some more intel.

Player A: Would that be a draw?

Dealer: You know what, yes, but I’m going to give you one rumour for free. Let’s see… Ok so you hear this old guy saying about how the bell in the tower is even older than the House. But the tower itself is even older than that.

Player B: So the tower was there before the bell?

Player A: And then the House came and shut it all down anyway.

Player B: So what was the tower built for? It’s just a tower, right?

Dealer: You don’t know. Maybe you’ll find out… Let’s start the Red Moon phase!

Thursday 13 October 2022

The Devil’s Own Luck

 

A new adventure for Graverobbers! Or any dungeon crawler you prefer. Spooky magic stuff in time for All Hallow’s Eve.

Available for download here.

Tuesday 13 September 2022

Cellars, Crypts & Catacombs

 

A new pamphlet for GRAVEROBBERS, my rpg system of stealth and sedition. Containing therein, amongst other things: a miniature sandbox of sidequests, a haunted graveyard, a secret laboratory, carousing rules, a playable in-world parlour game, cockney innuendo, and A Bear.

Available for download here.

Monday 1 August 2022

ADSPACE is on Kickstarter

 

I’m making a pamphlet adventure miniseries for Mothership as part of ZineQuest 4!

You can find out more and support the project here.

Thank you x

Friday 8 July 2022

electric palace bloodbath

On Monday I made a Mothership zine from scratch in 24 hours. Mainly as a challenge to myself to see if I could do it!

I’ll likely do a postmortem on here about how I feel it went etc, but for now you can download it for free on my online shop.

Happy gaming! x


Thursday 23 June 2022

Extradimensional Research Facility Theta

 ERFϴ is a private building on the Meridian city satellite. According to the satellite’s owners QGC, the facility researches the gate anomaly with the aim of improving their service.

This is where the mysterious persons in black aboard Meridian work. Investigating or tailing these individuals will lead the players here.


Anything locked can be opened only with a keycard.


1. Lobby. The only entrance. White tile, marble counters, healthy potted plants. Stylishly curved sofas that look as though they have never been sat on. There are security cameras in the upper corners. As with the rest of the building, there are no windows.

The unmanned reception has a computer, not connected to any network or containing any data. Files and folders behind the desk contain hundreds of blank pages. To either side are doors marked Research and Administration.


2. Research. A sterile, stock-photo laboratory. Brand new microscopes, empty flasks, Bunsen burners with no gas. Otherwise empty.

In the far wall is a large mirror, reflecting the lab. On the other side of the glass is Observation.


3. Administration. Spotless cubicles, each with a QGC branded mug and the same framed family portrait. Cabinets of blank files, unopened packets of stationary. Nobody here.

Anyone inspecting the cabinets notices a slight draft from behind the rightmost. Moving it aside reveals a door marked Observation.


4. Observation. Grey tile, floor to ceiling, and a single bare bulb. In the wall is a large window, the other side of the two-way mirror in Research. There is also a small door to Administration with a filing cabinet on the other side.

In the centre of the room is an adult female goat. White pads arranged about its head attach with twisting copper wire to a little machine, the size of a VHS player, sitting on a metal folding chair. The machine is on, lights flashing, but does not appear to actually do anything.

The goat is docile and unperturbed by visitors. Doors on the opposite side of the room are labelled Containment and Intelligence. The latter is locked.


5. Containment. A spacious corridor, bright white lights, spotless. At either side, glass specimen tanks are set into the walls, lit in ultraviolet. Several contain biohazards, one contains a crop of glowing mushrooms. Some are empty. All are locked.

A chute, torso-width, leads down into The Pit. It is unmarked except for various esoteric hazard signs. Next to it are black sacks, each containing an unconscious person in a smart black suit, drugged, bound and gagged.

At each end of the corridor is a door, marked Development and Observation respectively.


6. Development. A large cuboid room, neutral earth tones, soft lighting. The floor is slightly springy, faux tatami. The sound of gently trickling water plays from speakers in the upper corners, a repeating clip only a few seconds long. Beside the speakers are cameras, watching and feeding back to Intelligence.

In the centre of the room is a giant ivory chess piece, like a knight but with a ram’s head, over 10 feet tall. It is made of solid stone, or something equally heavy. Two persons in black stand either side of it, appearing to be in deep thought.

If anything distracts them from their training, they attack. [C:55 Subdue 1d10; I:55; W2(11), holding only a chess piece with a ram’s head containing a listening device]. One is holding a keycard.

The door to the right reads Containment. A door to the left reads Accommodation.


7. Accommodation. Dull cream walls, mottled green-brown carpet. Bunk beds, khaki hammocks taut on scaffold frames, enough for twenty or so. Each bed has a small, dense pillow containing a listening device which feeds back to Intelligence. 1d5 persons in black are asleep here, still in their suits and dark glasses. If one wakes, they all do.

The doors here are marked Development and Extraction.


8. Extraction. A long, wide hall. Occasional large, grey smudges on the otherwise pristine tile. The centre of the floor is a large grate with a hatch, locked from this side. Below is The Pit, a trench full of some slowly writhing gelatinous mass.

There is equipment here set up to extract elixir from the slugs below. This substance can be injected into the bloodstream to induce psychic awakening, though the results are unreliable.

Either side of the hall are exits to Accommodation and Intelligence. The latter is locked.


9. Intelligence. Cramped, musty, unlit except for banks of monitors and bleeping machine lights. Monitors show feeds from any security cameras in the facility. Banks of headphones, like a phone operator’s desk, monitor audio from any listening devices here or elsewhere on Meridian.

3 persons in black sit at the monitors here, wearing crisp white lab coats over their suits. They all have the PSI 1 skill and will use it in self defence, though they are largely unaware of its limits and may overextend themselves. Each has a syringe with a single dose of fast-acting knockout serum and a keycard. They may exit Intelligence to investigate if they notice more than one unusual occurrence.

The computers here contain files detailing the facility’s operations, scientific research mixed in with pseudoscience and veiled references. Agents are trained and tested here for psychic abilities. Candidates who react poorly to the tests are disposed of as food for the grey slugs, as are any interlopers.

The slugs are extradimensional aliens found through gate travel, as are the other life forms here. The ultimate aim of training these psychic operatives is unclear, but QGC’s research into extradimensional travel seems to be entirely predicated on mastering and understanding these abilities.


10. The Pit. Dank, dark, completely filled with forearm-sized grey slugs. Dim light from an overhead grate in the floor of Extraction, as well as a chute from Containment.

The slugs attach to the temples and consume brainwaves. Anyone not in an airtight suit must make a Body save in their presence or take 1 Stress per round as the slugs feed. A failed Panic check during feeding always results in a loss of 1d10[+] Sanity. Reducing Sanity to 0 this way results in brain death.

Monday 16 May 2022

Mothership character names

 This sneak peek at a bit of Another Bug Hunt (the starter module that will come in the Mothership 1e box set and the reason I haven’t been posting here much lately) got me thinking about character names.

I think naming things in general is something I’m good at, and I know it’s something other people struggle with sometimes. And it comes up quite often in this hobby as a thing that needs to get done.

But unfortunately like most times when people are just kind of good at a thing I don’t think I can really explain how or why I can do it. I just find it easy. (That’s what “style” is by the way, in creative work, leaning into the things that come naturally. If you don’t think you have a style, get lazier.)

I thought maybe if I wrote a bit about my thoughts, those ramblings might be useful to someone? I don’t have a process but if you see something you want to take here, take it. It’s what a lot of this blog ends up being, haha.

And since we’re talking about Mothership characters, here are some I’ve named. Minor spoilers, maybe.

The Haunting of Ypsilon 14

has maybe too many characters, but you know I had to fill out that sweet d10 table. Plus they don’t really serve “character” functions so much as being like… hit points.

I tried to include names from different parts of the world. Since there wasn’t enough space or any real need to detail character appearances, this would suggest that these people each looked a bit different from each other. But again, part of a new whole. Ypsilon was intended as an “introductory” module (to players, if not necessarily to Wardens), and that bit of cultural mish-mash is a good setting shorthand.

Thinking of cohorts of colleagues I’ve worked shitty jobs with myself, and with an image in my head similar to the crew of the Nostromo all sitting round and eating in that early scene, I tried to suggest what Mothership’s future looks like. Basically, a lot like now.

I also made sure to get differently gendered names in there, as well as at least one that could be read as either masculine or feminine. Like how the Alien script was supposedly written gender-neutral, because these things both matter and don’t.

Other than that I didn’t put a lot of thought into each specific name. They’re not references to characters or anyone I know. If I’d had more time maybe I would’ve done that, but I don’t know that it would’ve added anything. If the meme had been meme’d already I would’ve called Mike Dave.

Dr Ethan Giovanni is the only character with a first and last name given. This and the title makes him seem more important, so hopefully the next question, even if it’s subconscious, is “important to who”. Why is this guy written with a family name, a lineage, and the others aren’t? Spoilers: it’s classism.

Speaking of the good doctor and names, on his personal cassette he refers to someone, probably Mike, by a number rather than a name. Worker number something-or-other. Again, the question of who “gets” a name, an identity, and how much, and in whose eyes. In the corporation’s eyes, Mike is a blip on a spreadsheet.

Oh, and Prince. I think that was probably a reference to, y’know, Prince, but also I was likely thinking of that bit in The Simpsons when Santa’s Little Helper has puppies and one is “the puppy formerly known as Prince”. Prince is just a good solid pet name. (My rule for dog names specifically is that it must sound good when shouted across a park.)

One last thing - Kantaro, one of the workers. That’s a surname, not a first name. I think maybe in the back of my mind I thought “oh yeah, at this workplace, there’s probably that one guy everyone refers to by their surname”. American Office vibes, i don’t think there was a character like that in the show but that’s a thing people like that would do. “Hey it’s Johnson, hey Johnson”.

But now I think maybe that’s not something i should’ve expected the average reader (I assume, perhaps uncharitably, white and North American) to pick up on? So maybe it just confuses things. Then again, on those cool fan computer things I’ve seen people do, they list it as his last name. People get it. I’m probably just overthinking.

So next up was

Hideo’s World

Which, as a module itself, was named by Sean. Because as I recall I think I literally just forgot to name it. So maybe I’m not so good at this after all!

There’s only one character with a person name and that’s Hideo, and I didn’t name him - he’s an NPC from A Pound Of Flesh. So go bother someone else about that. I’m guessing he’s a reference to that one guy.

Mr Goodnight is the only other named character I believe. I’m pretty happy with that name. It sounds ominous enough while also sounding like a thing you’d actually call a mascot character, friendly and silly. For a pepsi that makes you sleepy lol. Yeah Hideo’s World is a bit chaotic overall but I’m very happy with the way it does setting.

And, to me at least, there’s something very unsettling about how his name is trademarked in the text itself! I don’t think anyone but me thinks of that as “horror”, but personally that’s one of the most weird and existential things I’ve come up with for MoSh, at least it effects me that way! I think he’s a very good baddie

Piece by Piece

Contrasting Ypsilon, everyone* in Piece by Piece has a first and last name. That’s because this is a murder mystery style adventure, like an episode of the X Files. And the police going over the case in that kind of film or show will always call people Firstname Lastname. Nobody stands over an establishing shot of a crime scene and says “yeah this is the victim, Brian”.

*except Curtis. This isn’t a tie-in to Gradient Descent but it came out around the same time-ish as i recall, and I was thinking about those themes, and the role of the android in MoSh. I like to play with the baked-in setting elements when I can, because it’s cheap, good grist, and Mothership has Androids. An android character playing through this adventure is going to have a very separate experience, I think. I wanted to emphasise that separation.

And “Curtis” specifically because in the Alien movies the androids are named alphabetically, and this was my third pamphlet.

As for the human names, I had a similar tack from Ypsilon. A bit of cultural variety makes it feel more specific and real, and at this point more Mothership. But still just normal people names from real life.

I think I tried to go in on the metaphor layer a bit more this time, not aiming for a “hidden meaning” just adding to a vibe. There are the surnames Nishida, Flores, Fuentes, Dragavei, all plants or Spring- or plant-related words. Growth, life. Human lives being the only(?) living, sentient things in this cold, sterile lab, the contrast between the organic living world and the not. And then we can blur those lines.

Dr Ojo was a more specific choice, she has a Yoruba name. Where I’m from there’s a huge West African population and in Yoruba culture you typically name a child based on the circumstances of their birth.

Anyway, Abidemi means “born without the father”, which ties into themes of parenthood, fathers failing their children and cycles of trauma in the adventure. As does Daedalus labs. (Also the map is a circle, did u notice. Also there’s a bit of a circle/eye/camera thing going on oh ok you’ve stopped reading, that’s fair)

The only other character is ABI i guess. Which is a robot-y name, and also a short form of Dr Ojo’s name. So it implies maybe she made her. Themes innit.

The only other one out right now is 

The Horror on Tau Sigma 7 

which I wrote for Magnum Galaxy games. Another one I didn’t name, because they already had a name for it. It sounds like The Haunting of Ypsilon 14, which btw I named that because it seemed like a good mix of pulp horror and pulpy sci fi. I think every game needs adventures with names Like That. The Thing of the PLACE.

Anyway, Tau Sigma 7.

… oh there’s no named NPCs in this one! :D

I specifically chose to not use any, because I thought that would serve it well as an introductory thing. One less thing to worry about whether running or playing.


And so we’re done.

Again, don’t really know what anyone is supposed to learn from this, but hopefully you got something from it. There will be more adventures with more names to come!


Btw, normally when I’m coming up with names for sci fi characters they’re absolutely terrible. Everyone sounds like the worst cyberpunk bounty hunters you’ve ever heard of. Things like Jimmy Lobster and Dusty Marie. I literally just made those up while writing that sentence. I’m doing a stream of consciousness thing. Here’s another one, wonder what it’s going to be, Ronaldo Ballsack.

So if anyone ever wants names like that, hit me up. I bet I could do d100 of em. Wenceslas the Viper. Artificial Ron. Marjorie “Good Grief” Golightly. I’m going to stop now.

(There’s one character with a silly cyberpunk-y name in an upcoming module, actually. He’s an asshole.)

Wednesday 11 May 2022

The Gutter

 The high street that runs the length of the residential quarter on the Meridian city satellite. Only the locals get to call it that.


Priced out of prefab QGC condos, the majority of the population live in a sprawl of shacks and shipping containers that grow up the slopes of the station’s artificial valley. Deep in their shadow, the city’s heart still beats.


What’s That Sound?

1. Sports fans gathered round a radio. You get all kinds of signals through the gate, if you have a machine that can handle them. Tune in from the other end of the galaxy.

2. Cassettes are a way of life for teenagers here. Expect to hear the same song copied and played until the tapes wear out, unless a spacer stops by with the next big hit.

3. The main way in which the Gutter’s myriad stall owners and street vendors compete is by being louder than the next person. Booming cries, tinny jingles, sizzling pans.

4. Excuse me, have you heard the good news? Pamphlets promise peace and prosperity. Flavour of the month is Godman Richard, a local healer nobody’s actually seen in years.

5. Screams from a back alley. Petty thugs, teen pranksters, community doctors, unlicensed casinos and sex workers all have their own ways of getting those noises out of a person.


Make Way!

1. The old street sweeper bot. Its AI is off, so it has no set schedule and doesn’t quite register people as obstacles. Can’t detect graffiti, either, but still does an ok job overall.

2. A bunch of kids playing a game. The one at the front has a big stick. Parents call them in from windows up above, past the laundry lines and lanterns.

3. Someone got a bike from Miracle Cycle and hasn’t figured out the brakes yet. Bicycles make a lot of sense on a station that’s one big circle. 100cr new, or plenty old and going spare.

4. Street performers. Nobody wants them, but nobody wants a Gutter without them. Lion dancers, musician troupes, folding tables for card tricks or the occasional honest game.

5. Some folk just aren’t used to the crowds. Spacers, stall owners, stray dogs, the high street’s always moving. Got to learn the flow or you’ll tread on someone’s toes.


Food and Drink

1. The Bent Spoon does the best bad coffee in town for 1cr a cup. Their herbal teas cost up to 5cr, but some are said to have medicinal properties.

2. Ragpickers flog whatever truckers bring through the gate. Even basics are expensive when imported, so get ready to haggle or you’ll be spending 10cr on a Goo-Chew bar.

3. Of all the busiest food stands, most agree that Mr Son’s Meat-Filled Buns are worth the queue. 2cr for a big mutton buuza. Mr Son’s smile, however, is priceless.

4. The food at The Golden Ass is surprisingly good for a strip club. Get a pitta platter, 10cr. TGA also donates old clothes, which explains some Gutter fashion idiosyncrasies.

5. Don’t get caught up in an argument over which unnamed kebab stall is the original. A lamb kofta box meal costs 4cr at either. They taste identical, but keep that to yourself.


Local Businesses

1. Giga Potato have all kinds of second-hand tech. The other stores get their neon signs and radios here. The owner Ellie also does tattoos and android repairs on the side.

2. Everyone knows that “Little” Jimmy Kozlov sells knock off weapons. Nobody says it to his face. 75% market price, break apart on a critical failure.

3. The fortune teller Madam Galkin is a charlatan, but her customers either don’t know or don’t seem to mind. 10cr for a reading and a weak cup of tea.

4. The Black Dog just opened and is already attracting unsavoury types. Just about the only place to get a drink around here, though.

5. Ratcatcher Keith retired when his dog Percy died. People say the old mutt must have trained the local strays to follow in his pawprints, though, because you rarely see a rat around.


Rumours and Gossip

1. That new pub, The Black Dog, used to be a club. It just suddenly closed down. The new dancer at the Golden Ass used to work there, I think.

2. Someone saw the men in black around that club that closed down. The Rabbit Hole, I think it was called. Anyway, the basement is all sealed off now for whatever reason.

3. You’ve seen them, right? The men in black. Always carrying those briefcases, but you never see them open. I bet they work for QGC. Some secret division. Keeping an eye on us.

4. How do QGC even know the gate is safe? I mean, think about it. Who really knows what that thing is? We could all be getting blasted with radiation, like, right now.

5. Aliens! It’s all aliens. They run the gate, they run QGC. Open your eyes, people!


Thursday 7 April 2022

the graverobber’s guidelines

Excerpts from a (hypothetical (probably never(can’t be arsed))) GM’s guide for GRAVEROBBERS


COIN

If players are ever stumped on how to overcome a challenge, remind them of the COIN in their pocket - their Crime, Odds, Inventory and Notes. Something written on their criminal record may give them an answer, or the beginnings of one. (This means good note-taking may be necessary!)

If more than one of these four facets of a character lean towards their succeeding, rule in their favour. For instance, a convicted Burglar with rope and a grappling hook in their inventory most likely has enough skill and the necessary tools to scale a wall without rolling the bones.


The Hangman’s Rule

Your role as Dealer is a lot like the popular game of Hangman, in which one player chooses a word which the others must guess letter by letter. Choosing an easy word provides no challenge or fun, while too obscure a word makes the game unfair.

When setting challenges for your fellow players, aim for somewhere in the middle, and remember that while the fun of the game is in them figuring out the answer on their own, you are the only one in the know. Guidance or corrections will be required when you misjudge a challenge.

Thursday 24 March 2022

Can I retroclone a game that isn’t real and also makes no sense help

 So you may or may not have heard of Yu-Gi-Oh, as one of the Big Three trading card games along with Magic the Gathering and Pokémon (I think they’re still the big ones?), and/or as a cartoon from the early 00s about teenagers playing said game for Stakes.

(Also while we’re on the topic i vaguely remember someone, I think it was Scrap Princess, doing a post about yugioh monsters a while ago? Like statting them for B/X or maybe even just talking about them based on the art. Anyone got a link?)

We’ve been rewatching the anime Chez Graverobber and having a great time. I decided to try the manga as I know it’s meant to be “”different”” and being a Shonen Jump title it’s included on their app.

(the Shonen Jump app releases all its comics, professionally translated, simultaneously with Japan, for free?? And anything older than the past 3 issues is archived and available for $2 USD a month?? It’s a ridiculously good deal, even if you’re just there to read One Piece. Anyway.)

The manga is indeed, uh, different. The cartoon many folks my age grew up watching is based on the second “season” of the manga and beyond, albeit restitched and sanitised for a Saturday Morning audience. Before that point the manga wasn’t about the card game much at all, but gaming in general - each chapter pretty much had a new game, Duel Monsters was just their MtG analogue that appeared once or twice.

Then it took off, they made the game a real thing kids could buy, it made money and became the focus. But yeah, for the first 60 chapters they play all sorts. Dice games, card games, yo-yos, an escape room, one where they’re manacled to a serial killer… the tone varies.

(Are either the manga or anime worth it? For camp value and nostalgia yes. If you’re not in it for those then probably not. Tone is all over the place - which I found charming. And the manga is interspersed with little games for the reader, like mazes or spot-the-difference all the way up to whole solo or 2P board games. Which aren’t great but - fun!)

We all caught up? Ok.

For the last 10 chapters of the manga’s first run, we’re introduced to a new character, Ryo Bakura, who brings with him plot development and homoeroticism and a new type of game.

The kids play a ttrpg! It’s called Monster World.

So I’m going to see if I can retroclone this fake game because of course I am.

To be clear - this is not an actual game. While Duel Monsters eventually got turned into actual cards with actual rules, Monster World never did. And the author, Kazuki Takahashi, is uh… notorious for not really following any kind of design logic in his in-world games’ rules.

(In an episode of the cartoon, a player declares their aquatic monster cards are invincible because they’re playing the game on a beach, only for the protagonist to play a card that’s just The Moon, draw the tide in and… yeah.)

So my task, which I have apparently set for myself, begins with reading these 10 chapters, noting down anything somewhat concrete I can learn about how the game supposedly functions, and see if I can get a rough image of what an actual RPG might look like featuring as much of that as possible.

Or at least that was the idea - as you can see from the notes below, I somewhat lost my mind in the process. There’s really no logic here at all. If I come back to this I’ll have a lot of work to do...



Monster World - notes:

- a “combination board game and role-playing game”.

    - “you know, like Hobgoblin or Mazes and Monsters!”

- standard GM and players setup - GM is called the Dark Master

- Dark Master has a Boss Monster, defeating the boss is the explicit end goal. Interesting I guess

- you can buy terrain tiles to join together and make your world map, cute. But not something i can do here

    - board is gridded, game uses minis.

    - bakura’s board is about 10x20 squares for the whole world - fields, mountains, town, forest, dark lord’s castle. Scale is like an over world map inf Final Fantasy, but uses that same scale for positioning in battles. Locations open up to reveal interiors, but still at the same scale(?)

-now referred to as an “adventure board game”

- the rules overview is very normal rpg stuff. The GM plays the world, players make characters and face challenges.

- explicit win condition for the GM too - defeat adventurers. Definitely more of a board game.

- now yugi’s saying it “combines elements”. I guess I’ll focus on the RPG bits.

- they have a “what is a tabletop roleplaying game” section lmaooooooo

- “it’s the original virtual reality!”

- ah here we go, concrete info! Races: Human, Elf, Half-Elf, Hobbit, Pixie-Fairy, Dwarf, Birdtail. We get a bit of info on each

    - it mentions the classic D&D stats, like elves have “high wisdom and charisma. Good magicians. Low strength.” But when we see the stats later, they’re different.

- Classes: Warrior, Beast Tamer, Magician, Bard, Priest, Enchanter, Martial Artist, Diabolist, Magic Gunman, Illusionist, Merchant, Thief.

- some of those sound cool! I don’t think they match 1-to-1 with any existing game? Maybe Sword World or some Japanese D&D clone? Probably just a selection the writer liked.

- we get character sheets for our four characters (and bakura has made them all minis). Entries for character name, race, class, weapon, equipment, abilities, level and HP.

- a couple of notable bits. The equipment, which seems tied to class for some characters and race for others - a throwaway line mentions that you need money to buy starting gear.

- The magic gunman has bullets listed, and also “6 special thunder grenades”. Bullets have no ammo count.

- and the numbers. Abilities are not in fact the Big Six, but Speed, Wisdom, Strength and Courage. Looks like the numbers are in the range we’d expect from a D&D-alike, nothing higher than 20, mostly 11-18, the occasional 8 or 9 dump stat.

- All characters are level 1, and hit points range from 18 for the squishy magician to 25 for the warrior.

- bakura is using a program on his laptop to do some calculations. The game is “too complex”

- you start on “start”

- “monsters will appear depending on the players’ actions… or sometimes, by random chance!”

- they “take five turns to enter the village”, seems to be referring to the overland travel it takes to get there.

- they chat with the barkeep in a very normal D&D conversational way (the bartender’s mini contains the trapped soul of a former player, but I feel that’s an impractical design goal)

- confirmation that the GM controls NPCs

- in dangerous areas, there’s a “Judgement Roll” to determine random encounters.

- dice! D100 system!

- encounter rate is 30, bakura rolls a 21, they encounter a level 3 goblin. D100 roll under.

- the warrior rolls a 13. bakura says that “based on the warrior’s level, speed and weapon”…”kills the goblin on a roll of 40 or less”.

- 1 hit kill, no HP or stats given for the enemy.

- “the closer you roll to 00, the more damage you do to the enemy”. So they have HP, and damage is based off the to-hit roll.

- 99 is a fumble! (And in the manga that means yami bakura traps your soul in a mini forever)

- encounter with an unconscious figure in the road. No roll apparent, bakura appears to be reading from or just checking his laptop, maybe just for notes

- encounter plays out in rp, side quest for treasure an a magic sword in the forest. They’re not sure to trust the NPC. Normal rpg bits

- forest encounter rate is 80%. Bakura rolls an 05. “The closer to 00, the stronger the monsters that appear!”

- 5 monsters. Fight!

- roll under “attack success rate” to hit, the closer you are to “critical” (00), the more damage you do. Same as before.

- warrior rolls 82, but needed a 30 to hit. For some reason. He trips and falls

- a bit of detail given on the gunman class - deals “magical damage” from the gun.

- gunman’s attack rolls a 21 - a hit, no reason given. The monster is defeated - again, 1 hit 1 kill, but I guess we can assume that that’s a coincidence or monsters are just generally weak because we know there’s HP and damage systems.

- well, we can’t really assume anything because this isn’t a functioning system. but

- the beast tamer (starts with no weapon, could be by choice though), uses his “magic hands” to make monsters into allies. 50% success rate given, it’s shown later that this varies but no metric as to how.

- “Hand power! The evil disappears from Poki!”

- the magician is “still an apprentice” at level 1, but sometimes “magic is more powerful than expected”

- immediately proven - she rolls 00, which is a “super critical hit” now. “That means she can use the top level magic for an apprentice magician!”

- Apprentice Final Big Bang!!! big explosion spell kills 3 monsters

- the quest giver NPC was actually Zorc, the Dark Master - the GM’s boss monster. the GM says that since the players were deceived and caught with their defences down, sorcerer takes the first attack. He rolls a “super critical hit” with a 00, so I guess that’s what they’re called from now on.

- ok at this point Zorc targets the player not the character, because of the manga’s plot, and seals her soul in her character mini. Also bakura claims that his “godlike game mastering techniques” allow him to roll crits whenever he wants. Unsure how much of this I’ll be keeping.

- a bit of plot, next player rolls to attack and immediately fumbles lol. But Bakura does state a rule here, or possibly just “gaming etiquette” as he refers to it both ways - rolling the dice without the GM’s permission is not allowed! I like this guy

- Players can roll for their friends whose souls are currently unable to roll dice. One of those edge case rules.

- Ok, back to the game. Zorc has a powerful aura, meaning that the magical gunman has to roll Courage or Zorc can preempt his attack. Basically a fear save, and we get a use for the courage stat. Those D&D stats are very much forgotten by this point lol

- “I’m not afraid of you!” “That’s for the dice to say…”

- fail, Zorc goes, gets another Super Critical. Still targeting the mortal souls of the players at the table rather than the characters though so no mechanical insight.

- Explicitly stated - if characters’ HP reaches 0, they die. Bakura is too hardcore for death saves

- btw they’ve mentioned a couple of times that the minis are made of lead. There are little hobbyist details like this for a lot of the games in the manga. In one chapter they go step by step through buying a figure, clipping the spruce, washing the resin parts, assembling and painting. Idk it’s cute.

- Bakura now has everyone’s soul in their minis, but yugi has two souls so he’s still playing. It’s a thing.

- Gunman rolls an 03 which hits, uses his Thunder Grenade. It blasts off Zorc’s hand! Not just cosmetic damage as it comes into play a few times, so possibly a hit location table… ok enough speculation, I’m just here for the FACTS goddammit -

- zorc’s hand turns into monsters, sure

- zorc flees. “Jerk! Creep! Power gamer!”

- warrior rolls a super critical and uses his Energetic Slash, which was vaguely mentioned before as being a special move. Unsure if that’s triggered by the low roll, as with the magician - could also be why the gunman used his grenade? Why am i looking for logic here

- beast tamer is gonna attempt another beast taming. The dragon was part of zorc’s arm until a few minutes ago which apparently makes the chances of brainwashing him 10%. Yugi rolls an 02.

- btw, if you think wow that’s a lot of criticals - turns out there’s a “technique” of rolling the 10s die like a spinning top and then using the other d10 to like… beyblade it into a lower roll. And jiggling the table with your leg to control the path of the dice. i should remember this for Mothership.

- Follow Zorc to his lair. the castle diorama is sick

- there’s an absolutely bullshit trap that isn’t really worth going into. And it doesn’t even damage the characters’ HP but the minis themselves, which are robust enough to last exactly 3 turns? Oh Takahashi, never change

- “Instant death traps are the tool of amateur game masters! A good game master prolongs the torture as long as possible!”

- 30% chance on the judgement roll of Zorc showing up since it’s his castle. He shows up. His attack success rate is 95% while the characters are stuck in a trap

- he rolls a 41 - Yugi’s HP goes down to 13 and Joey’s to 15. I don’t think there’s any real maths happening here

- they escape the trap by rolling exactly 33. What kind of tomb of horrors bullshit

- zorc’s turn, rolls a 12. But since the PCs have “much higher speed”, they have already moved behind him! And because they’re behind him, they get a surprise attack! A 15 hits!

- if any of that makes sense to you, no it doesn’t

- next chapter opens with the characters’ HP and levels in a little HUD, which is at least consistent from last time, and we also get Zorc info - he’s LV15, with 205 HP

- Yugi channels his friends’ anger into the dice (we’ve all been there) and rolls an 09 for the gunman’s attack, which bakura calls a “critical”. So I think 01-09 is a crit and just 00 is a super crit? For now anyway!

- gunman uses thunder grenade, lends credence to that crit theory from before. But am I just seeing consistency because i want to at this point? Does anything mean anything any more?

- the magician “gets a free attack too”, a 13 to hit, uses “Apprentice Death Blaze”

- beast master rolls 08 (a “critical”!) and all his beasts attack

- “Fools! You are still apprentices, level-one adventurers! You don’t have enough experience to defeat Zorc!” Experience is in bold. Tells us something about the campaign structure i guess.

- GM goes on a power trip here. Also gets out some special d10s with a human soul in them or something. Rolls a super crit. This attack can apparently “kill characters with more than 50 hit points in an instant”.

- Bakura uses his laptop to crunch all the variables because there are to many! But all the PCs survive with 1hp each! Because his left hand is being controlled by his real self- ok we can skip this bit

- warrior gets 05, hits, no more detail given. Oh but now it takes out his left eye? Idk

- i guess when all the rules of your game are about combat etc etc

- the magician’s level is too low for resurrection spells, but she can use “healing magic of luona”!

- but will she be able to do so before zorc’s next attack? Roll off for tied initiative apparently! Lowest wins

- Some plot happens. The healing spell goes off, heals everyone by An Amount

- zorc can now hit all of them if he rolls 80 or less

- why am I doing this

- who knows any more

- zorc fumbles and hits himself, now at 125 HP if that means anything to anyone

- the castle terrain is made of “durable poly-resin”! We know this because bakura impales his hand on a gothic spire

- beast master rolls a crit 05 to tame zorc, but he can’t at his level, but some plot happens and a new character appears, level 13 white wizard. No that wasn’t one of the classes. NPC apparently

- white magic lowers defences i guess

- gunman hits on a 15

- why am I doing every turn like it’s a play report, we all know this doesn’t make any sense by now surely

- zorc is at 81 HP. Changes form to Last Zorc. Rolls a 00 to hit but the white wizard can defend by converting HP to MP. Yes that is the first mention of MP so far

- they’re all still down on 1-3 HP. But after last zorc attacks his weak point is exposed, an eye on his torso. One of the beast master’s beasts tries to hold it open and sacrifice himself but they won’t let him. So the beast tamer uses his training hand to punch right through the eye hole (jet stream punch!), rolls an 02 (crit).

- the warrior rolls an 01 for an explosive energetic slash, whatever that is, and they win the battle

- no wait, they didn’t for some reason

- reroll initiative i guess? And the same roll is also to determine attack success, because stakes

- bad guy rolls a super crit but the dice explode from friendship

- Magician uses Final Big Bang, and the battle is finally over

- I’m so done

- There’s one more roll but it’s to restore a player’s soul.


So, uh, that’s as much game as I could find in the Monster World arc. Supposedly there’s more RPG action later on, and I’m morbidly curious so maybe I’ll report on that too. Whether or not I can retroclone this mess is another question… I do like a challenge, though. Who knows.

[To Be Continued…?]